Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
