That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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