Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
How's work?
Spinning.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
Boobs are out for the taking
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Randomize
