After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
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Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
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Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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