Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Randomize
