You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
Randomize