And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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