You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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