Tell her she can't have a vagina
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
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