are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
Randomize
