Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
i think im in europe. pls send help
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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