party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
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i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
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Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
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