Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
