there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize