Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
