dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Dude, we tried to feed you but you just started sobbing and ran away
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
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