I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
