I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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