He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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