Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
