How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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