My cat gives me a boner
It was confusing and full of hummus
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
where are my eyebrows?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
