So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
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