I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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