i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Randomize