Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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