Buhtt sex?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I don't think a check that has "thx for the drugs" on the note is really gonna fly.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Randomize
