We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
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