im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
I want you inside me. Finish your papers.
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