So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
They threw a beer at you on stage and then you stopped the karaoke and cussed everyone in the bar out for 2 minutes
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to wash the frat house off of me
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
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