I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
