saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize
