Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
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