Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
A+ Viking dick
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
