My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
