told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
It may be a corded vibrator from the 90s but it gets the job DONE
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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