Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Randomize
