After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
