Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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