he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
