I think I won the penis lottery.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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