why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
