Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
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