remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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