is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
it was like eating out sand paper
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize
