White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
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