okay pat passed out under dana's car
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
The best thing he's ever done for me was comment on my profile picture saying "hello boner"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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