i barfeds in our rink
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
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