What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
