I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
She leaned in close to me, made eye contact, and seriously whispered "I will eat your soul with bacon bits." I want whatever drug she was on.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
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